Mother's Day
It’s my very first Mother’s Day and I couldn’t feel happier, luckier or more content. Welcoming our Sunny into the world has been pure bliss. Thank you so much for all of your lovely messages over the past few months.
To celebrate this special day, I’ve reached out to some fellow mummas to collect their thoughts & notes on what motherhood has taught them. It’s amazing how our tiny little bundles can teach us the biggest and most important life lessons.
I also want to use this opportunity to send my love to all the women out there who have lost a baby or who are having fertility troubles. I wish you love and health on your journey to motherhood. You are all incredible and in my heart.
Happy Mother’s Day everyone,
Elyse x
1. What has your daughter taught you about yourself?
My daughter has taught me that love is infinite. She’s my person and I will be forever hers and I would do anything for her. I’d never quite known love like that before and it’s made me appreciate all the other relationships in my life so much more - mother, my sister… we’re all on this journey together and I feel so lucky.
2. When you're having an off moment or an off day, how do you seek self-assurance & confidence?
It’s never perfect and sometimes it gets hard and you want to cry … but people have it so much worse
I try to keep it light and happy I’m so lucky I can call my mother or sister or aunts and ask for help. And you just work it out
3. What is the best piece of advice you’ve received that you would like to spread onto other new mums?
Don’t sweat the small stuff
1. What have your babies taught you about yourself?
My babies have taught me more than I could ever possibly imagine, they have taught me about simplicity, connection, PATIENCE, tolerance, boundaries and the most beautiful part of life thus far, raising them, and watching them grow. I love just BEING THERE for them.
2. When you're having an off moment or an off day, how do you seek self-assurance & confidence?
When I am feeling off, I play music, it lifts the vibration, and can change the whole mood in a second. Music is such a gift to parenting and to our lives in general, we are so blessed to have the arts so accessible to us. Another little trick that has only become doable recently, is I listen to audiobooks while walking back and forth rocking my baby to sleep, it takes my mind off this gruelling task, and the pain from holding a chunky baby, Air Pods are a game changer for parenting!
For self confidence and assurance I always tell other mamas to trust your own inner compass, you know better than anyone what your child needs and what is best for them, read as much knowledge as you can, but only take what resonates with you.
Your heart and soul. If you listen to your intuition, all of the answers are right there. We naturally have all the tools, we were born to be mothers
3. What is the best piece of advice you’ve received that you would like to spread onto other new mums?
My dad always said something that resonated with me, Nicole, do whatever you need to do to keep your kids comfortable. It's as simple and as complex as that. I use that as my compass, it doesn't mean I spoil them and don't discipline them. I actuallt recently saw an interview where a mother is teacher her daughter consent, and if someone and relative wants a hug or a kiss she is allowed to say no, I think this is really important to teach and reapect kids boundaries, especially if we are trying to eradicate sexual abuse ect, I think we need to allow children to make clear and have a choice about what their boundaries are from birth. We don't own them, they are a gift that we have the responsibility of nurturing and guiding the best way we know how. There always needs to be a mutual respect between parent and child also.
1. What have your babies taught you about yourself?
To live in the moment and enjoy the simple pleasures! They’ve also taught me to have a crack at everything and I try my best to, for them.
2. When you're having an off moment or an off day, how do you seek self-assurance & confidence?
Exercise always clears the mind as well as some solo mumma time + chat to my husband.
3. What is the best piece of advice you’ve received that you would like to spread onto other new mums?
Treasure the moments cause they don’t last forever, but also that you will survive these moments because they don’t last forever.
NOT SO MUMSY (Marcia Leone)
1. What have your kids taught you about yourself?
My kids have taught me what life is all about- staying present and soaking in the simple moments.
They have given me confidence and drive to follow my purpose and believe in myself.
Oh and patience, but that’s a given ;)
2. When you're having an off moment or an off day, how do you seek self-assurance & confidence?
Motherhood can be really isolating and we certainly need our “ village “ to make us feel heard and less alone. Someone that can relate. Whether it’s a friend, your mum or an online community. Sharing feelings and having others relate can do wonders to your mindset.
I often share my low moments of social media so other women understand that we all have tough times. No one has it all together all the time. What I’ve found is that by being vulnerable it allows others to do the same and it’s often me that is reassured by the comments of my community
I also like to step out barefoot on the grass to ground myself - failing that, sometimes you just need a good cry and a cup of tea!
3. What is the best piece of advice you’ve received that you would like to spread onto other new mums?
I feel like “advice” and “motherhood” is a minefield. As soon as we fall pregnant we are bombarded with the shoulds and shouldn’ts and it only gets worse when the baby is here. Unsolicited advice can become really overwhelming and make you doubt yourself and your own parenting style. So my advice when it comes to advice is take what resonates, leave what doesn’t and trust your own instinct every single time! You are doing a great job.
1. What has your baby taught you about yourself?
Little Hunter has taught me so much in the little time he has been with us. Firstly and probably the most surprising (although probably not surprising to other Mumma’s out there) is that I can now survive on very little sleep.
Hunter has also taught me to appreciate my body in a way that I don’t believe I could ever have done without going through childbirth. The old me would have been so distressed by the sight of my soft tummy and saggy boobs, but I am so proud of what this body went through to grow him into the little man he is. I think it’s truly incredible what our bodies can do.
2. When you're having an off moment or an off day, how do you seek self-assurance & confidence?
I am a firm believer in practicing positive affirmations. I practice positive affirmations whenever I can – it keeps me calm, and helps me remain positive in all aspects of life. The moment I start to slack off is when negative thoughts can start to creep in and get the better of me, but a few minutes of meditation and positive affirmations gets me right back on track.
3. What is the best piece of advice you’ve received that you would like to spread onto other new mums?
The first three weeks of motherhood were pretty tough. Hunter wasn’t feeding or sleeping properly and we were absolutely exhausted. At the time I just felt like something wasn’t right and I called my sister in tears saying “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong” and she said to me “Fee, just trust your instinct. What does your gut tell you?”
Fortunately, we had a scheduled visit from the midwives the next day and within minutes the midwife informed me Hunter had a severe tongue tie that needed to get sorted ASAP. As soon as we had it fixed, little H was good as gold! So the biggest piece of advice I have is trust your gut - Mummy knows best!
SARAH SMITH/BOULAZERIS (@thisisme.sb)
1. What has your baby taught you about yourself?
My kids have taught me how much I am capable of when I’m passionate to reach personal and career goals. Before kids I had all this “time” and flexibility, now I’m the busiest I’ve ever been doing full time mum life but my determination and motivation is stronger than ever to achieve more and constantly raise the bar.
2. When you're having an off moment or an off day, how do you seek self-assurance & confidence?
Am I doing it right? Are they getting the right balance of nutrients in their meals, do I read enough.... so many questions and doubts doing mum life. Simply Reminding myself that I’ve raise healthy happy children and acknowledging all the things we have achieved together how amazing that is and not being so hard on myself.
3. What is the best piece of advice you’ve received that you would like to spread onto other new mums?
Embrace every moment and be all there, the rollercoaster of life is the most beautiful experience that happens so quick. And write in their baby book often haha, one minute they are waving the next they are telling you to “mamma clean up mess” and “pack it away” in the kitchen.
1. What has your baby taught you about yourself?
My kids have taught me how much I am capable of when I’m passionate to reach personal and career goals. Before kids I had all this “time” and flexibility, now I’m the busiest I’ve ever been doing full time mum life but my determination and motivation is stronger than ever to achieve more and constantly raise the bar.
2. When you're having an off moment or an off day, how do you seek self-assurance & confidence?
I’m a talker! I talk things over with my trusted people and try and come to a resolve by the end of the conversation. I try to go inward and not outward for confidence. If I seek self-assurance from others, I never feel full, it’s never enough. I always consult my heart and soul to realign if I’m off the track. It’s something that serves me well.
3. What is the best piece of advice you’ve received that you would like to spread onto other new mums?
The best piece of advice I received was to be kind to myself and not feel like I had to execute everything perfectly every time. To take the pressure off and to rest whenever you can (I’m still working on that one!)